The Way of Grace

The nuns taught us there were two ways through life - the way of nature 

and the way of grace. You have to choose which one you'll follow.

I've never written a movie critique before, but after watching the Tree of Life for a third time, I'm feeling particularly inspired. Sure there are many movies that some people like and some people don't (i.e. Saw VI), but never before have I experienced such a radical degree of polarization over a film. After arriving home from the second viewing, a neighbor staunchly commented that it was the worst movie she had ever seen. How's that for a movie review? Other people I know have snored their way through it and even left the movie theater in extreme consternation - partly because the theater staff wouldn't provide a refund. On the other hand, there is a certain type of people that has been moved to tears and profoundly affected by the emotional and existential significance of the subject matter. But how can this extreme contrast exist? How is it possible that we lie on such opposite ends of the spectrum of internal experience? I use the term experience because even if one doesn't understand the film the first time through, one is still capable of feeling its effect.

In other words, you don't have to fully understand it to be significantly moved. But how are we being moved exactly? What aspect of us is being moved? Could it be worthwhile to explore this? Could it be worthwhile to find out how to access this state more often? So what exactly is this state (for lack of a better term)?

The director calls this Grace - and if for no other reason, this film seems to have been made solely to help us get in touch with it.

On Nature & Grace

I will refrain from posting major spoilers - read on with ease. As the opening quote declares, there are two ways through life and these form the ever-present thematic backbone of the film. They are described as thus:

1. Nature only wants to please itself. Get others to please it too. Likes to lord it over them. To have its own way. It finds reasons to be unhappy when all the world is shining around it and love is smiling through all things.
2. Grace doesn't try to please itself. Accepts being slighted, forgotten, disliked. Accepts insults and injuries. The nuns taught us that no one who loves the way of grace ever comes to a bad end. 

We are biologically and neurologically wired for Nature. If you live in and/or identify with modern society (about 99.9% of us), chances are that Nature is what you see all around you. We don't have to peer very deeply into ourselves to find it there as well, lurking eternally as a brutish, selfish, vulgar - but ultimately well-meaning - roommate of the mind. Nature strolls through our brains, undetected, unchallenged, and inadvertently accepted, present in even the most delicate moments of our lives. It entices the forceful snatching of a toy by one child from another. It arouses the anxieties that push us down the neverending paths of success and perfection. It incites us to argue, to fight, to desire, to strive for, to win, to be superior, to be wanted, to hate, and to despair. It is the reason we go to war and it's the source of all our worries, fears, and insecurities. For better or worse, this is our Nature, and neither we nor primates could have survived the last 75 million years without it.

Father, Mother. Always you wrestle inside me. Always you will.

But something else evolved down the avenue of human evolution... some byproduct of human brain development that resides slightly outside the jurisdiction of our conscious thought. It opposes Nature, continuously wrestling with it for chances in the spotlight of our awareness. So when it does triumph over nature and catch our attention, what is it good for? Well, for one, it allows us to appreciate aspects of life that are largely inconsequential to our survival. How else could we appreciate something like a painting? Or a song? Or humor? Or animals? Or the natural world? Or the vastness and beauty of space? Or friendship? Or love? Or our very existence for that matter? In the same vein, why are we moved by generosity? By humility? By compassion? By forgiveness? What psychological mechanism nudges us towards spirituality? Nature cannot provide the drive for these impractical but immensely fulfilling pursuits. So by what magic, divine providence, or unexpected evolutionary adaptation have we become capable of such... such... what should we call it? Oh yeah, Grace. The experiences listed in this paragraph are all a function of Grace.

But should we stay there? Should we not? Should we defy our Nature and reside for increasingly longer days on the steps of Grace? Whatever your answer, the Tree of Life is an unwavering supporter of Grace and suggests we stick around it for as long as possible, and to take our sweet time and sweep the steps with a broom while we're at it. I suspect that the more Grace you have experienced throughout life, the more easily the film will resonate within you, the more clearly you will see the purpose.... and the less amount of time you'll spend sleeping through it.

The only way to be happy is to love. Unless you love, your life will flash by.

If you haven't seen the film, I strongly urge you to do so; and if you have already seen it, I strongly urge you to see it again, especially if you didn't like it the first time around. Here are some tips to squeeze some extra juice out of your next viewing:

• Relax all your expectations of a story or plot. This film will violate them - let it do so.
• Whatever traces of a plot there are in the film only serve as tools to stir up some Grace inside you. Again, let it stir.
• Pay very close attention to the voiceover narration throughout the film. It will guide you, as short and abstract as it is.
• Brad Pitt (the father) represents Nature. Jessica Chastain (the mother) represents Grace. This is important.
• Sean Penn represents the eldest of the 3 brothers, Jack - much later in life. He is struggling with the Nature/Grace dichotomy.
• The middle (blonde) brother is the one that dies in the beginning. He is much closer to Grace than his older brother (Jack) is.
• The dinosaur scene is not a joke. It's a display of Grace triumphing over Nature in the unlikeliest of places.

If you've seen it, I'd love to hear your thoughts - no matter how positive or negative they may be.